Pegging is a gentle act of submission for us. I enjoy it that way, I want him to feel the sensual side of sex. I want him to feel emotions while I hold him and penetrate him slowly. I want him to feel comforted as I gently slide myself in and out of his body.
He expressed his desire for me to try being less gentle with him. I was apprehensive at first but we like to try everything and I decided to give it a shot. We strapped up like usual but I put on some more fast paced, upbeat music. It was tough to get into the swing of things right away but once we warmed up, I really started going to town. His face was buried in the pillow as I took him from behind. I could hear his muffled grunts as I pushed myself in and out of him, thrusting nearly the full length of the toy.
We did have a safe word and a quick public service announcement that pegging should not be painful. A quick shout out to Ruby Ryder for reminding us that pegging should not be painful! Start slow, get a good rhythm before any fast paced thrusting. Wait for his body to accept you before you start going to town on him. Once his nether regions have accepted your toy, increase the pace and force until you see indication that he is in any sort of pain or discomfort.
The intention is to be forceful enough to dominate him but not to cause him harm of any kind. Healthy sexual play is exciting, increases your bond and even unlocks emotions. Aggressive pegging will certainly be a different experience than you’ve had before.
How did it go for us? We had a great time! He looked back at me a few times, wide eyed at how much I got into it. I swear I even broke a sweat too. I don’t know how you guys do it for so long, constant thrusting is quite the workout. He was more submissive than usual afterwards and possibly a bit tender on his sides from how tightly I was gripping the small of his back. All in all, a great time.
Do you peg hard or gentle?
Emma, your description of pegging is a wonderful articulation of how I feel when My Love takes me. In a previous post someone wrote that the physical aspect is more dominant for the giver and the emotional is more dominant for the receiver. This is definitely true for me (although both aspects do exist when giving and receiving, just to differing degrees).
But your question was do we peg hard or gentle? And the answer is either depending on our moods/desires in the moment.
My emotions though differ depending on whether I ask to be taken hard, or if My Love decides to be more aggressive because it pleases her to do so.
Asking to be fucked allows me to feel empowered and acknowledge/own my needs (and it is a need for me, at times I just want to be fucked). Being a male and asking to be fucked goes against societal norms, and while My Love and I have long ago given up worrying about those norms, deep inside me there is still a sense of shame that I let go of every time as ask to be fucked.
When My Love pegs me hard because she wants to, I go to a more submissive place where I want to be owned by her and used for her pleasure. I want it to be a bit uncomfortable physically as it reinforces my submissiveness and that I am here for her pleasure. At the end of one of these pegging sessions I want to feel sore, and tired and well fucked (note: we have safe words and great communication, so actual harm is not an issue).
Your description of the shame associated with “asking to be fucked” is interesting. Kevin admitted to feeling ashamed or bashful when asking for me to show my love for him in this way. One thing that helped him overcome the self-imposed stigma that you described is asking him to “tell me what you want”. I’d stand there, strapped up and ready but I wouldn’t go any further until he told me specifically what he wanted me to do to him.
Now, we don’t do this every time but when we first started he was quite bashful and this helped him overcome his mental reluctance to ask me for something that his mind stigmatized.
Thanks for your comment!
Oh, don’t get me wrong Emma, I am no longer reluctant to ask My Love to fuck me, or to even tell her how much I wish her cock was real*, as she is so accepting and loving of my quirks. But, deep down there is still a little part of me that is, and probably always will be, a little bashful (much better description for me than shame – thanks) about liking it so much.
* Footnote regarding wishing her cock was real: I do not have fantasies about sex with a man, it doesn’t arouse me at all. But, if My Love is going to peg me, it would make it so much better if she truly was fucking me and could orgasm inside me. Her thrusts would be more natural, generated by her pleasure, her need to orgasm. I would truly feel what is is like to be taken by the person I love and give myself to.
Do you always remove cage when pegging?
My wife and I have enjoyed the pleasures of pegging for many years. We have done it enough to know that we both need to be in the mood, and found that our play-swing is the best place for both of us. I can adjust the height for her to comfortably fuck me senseless, and if she’s in the mood, she can easily Velcro cuff me to the swing chains! She was a bit uncomfortable and reserved when we first tried it. To say she is no longer reserved would be an understatement, and now I think she gets more turned-on by ordering me to suck her BBC and calling me degrading names as she tells me what she is going to do to me, because she knows how turned-on I get! Since we started experimenting with chastity, sometimes she leaves my cage on and takes it as a challenge to make me cum. I do agree that it should never be painful, especially in an unwilling sence. When we first seriously considered strap-on play we did our homework and found some good instructional videos of the do’s and dont’s of anal intercourse. That turned out to be a good thing in two ways, she learned that it’s not a ram-jam affair, and always takes it slow with lots of lube and fingering to get me loosened up. It also gave her the confidence to try anal herself. She had a past bad experience before we met, and anal had always been a hard no for her, but now she thoroughly enjoys it! Personally, I’m a bit of a pain slut, and like a vigorous pounding once I’m fully opened up! The first time I experienced a strap-on induced prostrate orgasm in my cage, I was so overwhelmed by the anal stimulation leading up to it that I didn’t even have a hard on. It felt like a ruined orgasm, in the sense that it seamed to last for ever and my cum didn’t run out for a long time after it kicked off. But as Ruined-Julie says, an orgasm is an orgasm!?