Humiliation is deeply arousing for men. I’ll be honest, I don’t really get it. If he told me that his ex had bigger tits than me (she did), I’d just shrug and say “great”. If I flip that around and tell him that my ex had a bigger cock than he does (he did) it makes him feel humiliated but also deeply aroused. I won’t get into the why, that is a topic for other blogs that I’ve written and it is equally fascinating. Turns out that it is healthy to experience sexual humiliation assuming it is followed by conversation if you strike any chords.
Your dick is small and that is why I lock you up
Ouch! That is something I never would have never uttered six months ago but guess what, he loves it! It plays into his humiliation fetish and it gives him a rush of testosterone and oxytocin that he so craves. Is his dick small? It really depends on who you are comparing him to and the the importance of size to me. I’ve said before that there are many reasons I actually like them small especially in a deep loving connection like I have with Kev. For the one night wham bam thank you ma’am I would probably prefer something larger/thicker and guess what, that is OK. That’s why Kev has an arsenal of cock sleeves and why I have play partners equipped with different shapes and sizes.
I should first clarify that humiliation is frequently tied to the cuckold fetish but I want to emphasize that not all cuckolds are into humiliation and not all guys who enjoy humiliation are also into cuckolding. They are not mutually exclusive. For the fellas that enjoy both cuckolding and humiliation, they typically crave sexual submission. Remember that the penis is not the biggest sex organ on the male body, the brain is. Anyone can rub a penis but not everyone can stroke his mind in just such a way that he craves every inch of your being.
Humiliation in the cuckold context most often states something that could be an obvious conclusion such as:
- I am fucking him because he has a bigger dick than you.
- He is younger and better looking than you, I want him but I don’t want you.
- You are sitting in the chair watching me fuck another man.
Another context for humiliation might be making him do something that he wouldn’t otherwise do:
- Get the other guy a beer.
- Compliment the other guy.
- Acknowledge that the other guy is bigger, better, luckier, whatever.
- Help the other guy get hard or perhaps other sexual things with the other guy.
The catch is that he should be TOLD to do these things since the fetish is around submission. If he does it on his own, there is little/no submission involved and therefore the hotness factor is much lower.
Boosting things to the next level takes him from an observer to a participant. Rather than just stating what is going on, involve him in the response and don’t accept anything but a complete sentence as an answer.
- How does it feel to know that I am fucking him because he has a bigger dick than you?
- I want you to tell him that your wife wants him because he is younger and better looking than you.
- You are sitting in the chair watching me fuck another man. Tell us how much you love watching us.
- Come over here and compare your cock to his. Hah, someone doesn’t quite measure up. Now you see why he is getting attention and not you.
Yes, these sound insane. I know. All of them have a small amount of truth but they are intended to raise his blood pressure and boost his sexual response. Guess what, they work. Despite knowing they are coming, they hit like a freight train and you can see the panic encrusted pleasure in his eyes.
So why hasn’t he asked for this sooner?
You can’t just ask to be humiliated, that defeats the purpose. Humiliation must be unexpected to feel authentic. If an attempt at humiliation seems inauthentic, it won’t be humiliating.
Husband: Tell me that I have a small penis.
Wife: You have a small penis.
Husband: Ok… thanks…
See what I mean? It just doesn’t work. How about initiating sex with him and at the last moment telling him that you want him to get a cock sleeve so you can “feel him”. During your fun time, say things like I wish you were this thick all the time! Think how much sex we would be having. This plays into both the SPH fetish and his denial fetish, yum.
Are you kidding me? Nobody does this.
I’m not kidding you. Over 58% of men have this fetish. That is a huge (pun intended) amount of guys and while some may not want their partner to exercise this fetish they’ve found themselves aroused by size play.
When not to do it?
Set aside specific play times with a defined start and end for your SPH play. Yes this means you shouldn’t tease him about the baby carrots in the grocery store unless you can make time to end the play session afterwards. I’ve actually done this baby carrot example once. We were grocery shopping and I held up the single baby carrot and said “Does this look like anyone we know?” and giggled a little bit while he got red in the face and several produce shopping onlookers tried to hide their giggles at the poor man’s misfortune. It is important that you not make SPH part of your everyday life, this can be detrimental to his overall well being. In the grocery shopping example above I was intentional to grab his butt, kiss his neck and tell him that I loved him and I appreciate the way we can play in public like that.
If you’re like me, I’m not great about this type of unless I have specific examples that I can use immediately so here are a few.
- Verbal teasing and insults like the example above at the grocery store, little hand gestures or snide remarks. Terms like baby dick, underdeveloped penis and clitty as a reference to his little guy can be fun.
- Physical ideas like pulling out a tape measure in the bedroom and measuring his penis. Laugh and mock as you put the tape measure away. You can even incorporate this into sexual denial and say something about needing to be this big to ride.
- Schedule weekly measuring sessions to see if he is growing and confirm he isn’t.
- After you measure it, refer to him by the number of centimeters or inches he is when he is soft. Hey hubby, why don’t you bring old two and a quarter over here so I can laugh at it.
- Sexual denial and SPH go hand in hand, literally any type of testicular restraint can be used to immobilize him and give him a randy teasing. If you were a little bit bigger you would be fucking me instead of tied up in that silly contraption.
- The concept of “a real man” is problematic yes but fetish overrules in some cases with proper aftercare. Explain how real men are bigger and how he can only hope to be as big as a real man capable of satisfying you.
- The SPH handjob is a fun one where you stroke his cock and explain how much bigger your lover or your dildo is and why his little penis cannot come close to the parts of your body that bring you pleasure.
- While having sex, express how much better it would feel to be fucked by a real man.
- When he attempts to initiate sex, laugh and say with that little thing? I don’t think so.
- When you initiate sex tell him you got horny thinking about getting fucked by real men and you want him to fuck you so you can laugh at the difference.
- Tell a friend. This one can be hit or miss but SPH jokes in front of friends especially in describing the motivations behind your hotwife or cuckold lifestyle can be incredibly exciting.
- If you are a cuckold couple, using references to his little guy while he is watching you enjoy your bull can be a wonderful time especially if there is a sizable difference between the two.
- When viewing porn together, make him apologize for being smaller than the men that are in the videos.
- Make him google “what women think about small cocks” and have him read the articles that he finds.
- Buy a shirt that says “I only fuck men with big dicks” and wear it around the house.
- Invite a friend over and have him stand in front of the two of you while you are clothed. Make fun of his penis together. This is called CFNM or clothed female nude male and it can be deeply arousing for both.
- Make him wear panties and tell him that he might as well be a woman with a penis that small.
- Look bored or yawn when having sex and comment about not being able to feel him. For bonus points, tell him that you might as well stop because you can’t feel him anymore.
- Tell him to tuck himself back between his legs and laugh at his lack of penis. Taking pictures can be fun.
- Tell him to masturbate while you watch and make fun of him stroking his little penis. For bonus points, make him ejaculate on your feet or the floor and lick it up because “that’s what little dick boys do”.
- CBT or cock and ball torture can be a great part of this kink. Whip or flog him as punishment for being equipped with an inferior penis. The balls can take quite a beating and won’t undergo serious damage. Do a web search for the practice before starting.
- Tether him by the balls to an object in the room and tell him that a real man would be unlocked. Use this time to talk to your boyfriend on the phone, video chat or even masturbate in front of him to show what he is missing out on by being underdeveloped.
- Have him post his little guy online in a SPH forum and open it up to ridicule by others.
- Explain that he doesn’t deserve to put his tiny nub of a cock inside you and make him repeat it.
- A great backhanded compliment in these types of scenes is a comment like “I don’t love your cock but I love you”.
- Masturbate beside him and tell him that you are thinking of other men because you could never be satisfied by his pathetic penis.
- For cuckold couples, make him stand beside your bull and compare cocks with the bigger fella. Make him acknowledge the size different and compliment your bull’s “superior” penis. You can even have the bull participate in the SPH but make sure the bull is ok with it prior to the session. This can feel weird if he isn’t prepared beforehand. For bonus points, have him suck your bull and worship “a real penis”.
- Buy condoms that are too large for him and deny sex when he can’t make the condom fit.
- Make him use a pocket pussy or flesh light and humiliate him with comments while you watch him use it. Tell him that the only pussy he can satisfy is a rubber one.
- Record yourself having sex with a larger man and make him masturbate to that video and keep a dialog going about how much bigger he is. See how he made me moan, you never do that because you are too small. Be sure that this is a two way conversation!
- Compare his penis with your ideal size dildo.
- Dress him up in sexy/feminine clothes and peg him while he is dressed. Remind him how much bigger you are than him.
- Explain to him that this isn’t a temporary thing, you’ve been unhappy for quite some time and you are thrilled that you don’t have to live a lie with his tiny pathetic cock any longer. You will never be satisfied by him again and need to find better men to satisfy you.
- Get a cock sleeve for him to feel like a real penis and use that with any intercourse.
- Make him wear a pair of your yoga pants and make fun of the lack of bump in them.
- Put a pink bow around it and have him walk around the house nude.
- Have him use a large size dildo on you and then fuck you immediately after. You will have adjusted to the size of the larger object and neither of you will be able to feel anything.
- Fuck me wearing a strap-on. I have needs and your little penis can’t satisfy them. Wear my strap-on so I can feel what it is like to be fucked by a real man for once. Be absolutely over the top with your moans and make it known how much better it feels.
- When having sex, ask if it is in yet.
- When having sex, call your lover (or pretend like you are) and talk on the phone.
- Text other men while having sex with him and act disinterested or disconnected.
- Hold a ruler beside him the entire time he masturbates. When he cums, make him cum on his tummy and feed it to him with your fingers.
- Listen to some audio stories together. like this or this or even this. How about this or this or this as well?
Do you have any more to add to this list? Leave them in the comments below!
Storytelling – With a Twist!
Tell him about your latest adventures either real or made up and ensure to spice it up with reasons behind why you are adventuring outside of your relationship. The devil is in the details but not the details of the encounter, instead the details of why you are meeting your needs elsewhere. Here is an example.
I know you sleep right beside me at night but I chose to drive an hour to see him because he is so much more attractive so much bigger and so much more manly than you can ever hope to be. When I got there and saw the size of his cock and his beautiful body, I knew that you would never come close to satisfying me and why I resort to finding other men to satisfy that missing part of our marriage. You will forever be my emotional rock but an innately sexual woman like me needs her physical needs met and let’s be honest, you’ve never quite measured up in that department or come close to satisfying me sexually. Our relationship has always been about on our strong emotional bond and we are best friends and soul mates, right babe? Right?
As I mentioned above, this is all well and good but it is important to give proper aftercare after every single session. This involves righting the wrongs and reminding him that it is just a fantasy for the both of you to enjoy together. Don’t even consider a single one of these things unless you plan to do aftercare. This isn’t about emotional abuse, it is about enjoying a mindset and a fantasy together. This is about enjoying your relationship and sexuality together and ultimately having fun with it. The moment you both stop having fun is the moment that you should stop. Until then, enjoy!