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I absolutely adore my husband. He is such a good provider and protector. He loves me and supports me in my living the most fulfilling life possible. I sometimes feel the need to pinch myself to make sure this is not a dream from which I will soon awake. He works hard and smart so I don't have to, allowing me to only engage those things I find enjoyable and fulfilling. Then he comes home and takes on almost all of the tasks needed to have a well-run household, leaving me to handle the finances as I see fit. None of this could be possible without his devotion to me. Chastity helped this to be brought out.
We initially used a chastity cage and though long-term wear was uncomfortable, to a great degree that served us well. We then upgraded to a cage that utilized a Prince Albert piercing and that increased the security tenfold. But there is even a means to hack that approach. After many years we started using what I call Cageless Chastity. This comes from the understanding that male orgasm was meant for reproduction, female orgasms were meant for fun! Maybe in another post, I will share why we believe that.
The male body is designed to automatically discharge any unneeded sperm ejaculations while my hubby sleeps.
That happens about every 6-7 weeks, which is about normal for his age. Between those events, I trust him not to masturbate and he knows I view masturbation as a breach of our covenant. But I verify his honesty by the following.
Weeks 1-2 at any moment I can call him to me or approach him and begin to handle his package. In 60 seconds or so it needs to show the appropriate response. in weeks 3-4 I merely ask him to expose himself and then look at me which also should elicit the expected outcome in 60 - 90 seconds. in weeks 5 until he has his nighttime discharge I have him expose himself and I can talk him into an erection by simply using my voice. "remember when we were young and you nailed me on that picnic table?" "Do you remember when we were going at it so hard and heavy I had to finish you with a blowjob because I was so sore?' Then I look at him with a smile and he is soon bobbing in the air. If he ever were to masturbate he would fail one the of tests and he knows what happens if he fails.
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When he does have a nighttime discharge he is to wake me and show me that it happened before I dismiss him to go clean himself up. Except for the occasions when I am just too tired to turn on the light and inspect his mess. I acknowledge what happened but ask him to leave the mess and show me in the morning.
It only took a few failures for us to get to where we are now.
As another practitioner of cageless chastity, I agree that guys can be successfully trained to stay chaste even without a device.
Aside from your erection tests (which my wife also uses to measure my enthusiasm), she also simply judges my compliance simply by my mood and the words I use to communicate with her. She’s really good at this and has caught me out within a few hours of a transgression. She is amused by how easy I am to read!
My wife’s superpower for guessing about masturbation is one of the strongest forces that prevents me from violating the promise. My last unauthorized one was just after Christmas, so I am proud of my resolve.
The difference for us is that my wife does think that male orgasms are for fun too; she just likes to be the one to administer them, or to instruct me to do so if we mutually masturbate.
It’s hard to describe how thrilling it is when she tells me that she wants me to cum. Even though I could easily rub one off any time (being cageless), the other strong force that keeps me in line is that I long for her to give me one. Reaching the peak of pleasure at the discretion of the love of your life is just such a beautiful experience.
I also love tease and denial. My wife knows this, but she loves to give me orgasms. I tell her that I want to get to the point where I have no idea if she will let sex end with an orgasm for me. But I can almost always tell when she is feeling generous. I guess we both read each other’s signals quite well.
I have to ask you, Katie: do you not enjoy administering the pleasure of an orgasm to your special man? Do you not miss this? Tell us more about your covenant.
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I am so proud of you! To have the restraint you demonstrate is the mark of a genuine man.
I love how your wife reads your moods. It is certainly something I have observed in my hubby but it sounds to me like she has honed it to an art form. Kudos to her.
You and your wife have every right to feel that male orgasms are for fun and to enjoy as many or as few as you desire.
Thank you for caring enough about our beliefs to ask. I enjoy sincere, healthy, respectful conversations. and I think they are a great opportunity for all of us to learn and grow.
But before I answer you as to my beliefs, I have a few leading questions of my own 🙂
Why are women capable of having multiple orgasms while men are generally one and done?
Post orgasm, women feel drawn to their partner, most men roll over as if having just finished a task, why?
Male orgasm is essentially required for procreation but not female orgasm, why is that?
Men typically reach their sexual peak at about 18 years old and slowly lose the ability to have or maintain an erection often needing medicine in an attempt to bring life to something that nature obviously has decided has served its purpose and needs to shrivel away (pun fully intended).
Most women are put off by the idea of their guy masturbating, most guys love the idea of their lady masturbating, in fact, there are pay sites where women are paid to masturbate and men pay for the privilege of watching, why?
Posted : 03/05/2021 10:26 am
As another practitioner of cageless chastity, I agree that guys can be successfully trained to stay chaste even without a device.
I completely agree my friend. Up until mid-February, I was one of the practitioners of cage less chastity for a variety of reason. As of then, I am now among the caged husbands even though for nearly 10 years I was completely chaste because it was one of the most important covenants of our relationship. It was simply forbidden for me to even touch myself sexually in any without her permission and direct supervision ... let alone masturbating. In my marriage, my beloved Ms. K. made it perfectly clear that any unauthorized masturbation was the same as stealing (her orgasms) and cheating. Thankfully I can honestly say that during that entire time I never once masturbated with permission.
In the beginning we used a cage because frankly we thought it "required". *smile Not really required but you know ... how could we call ourselves a WLM if i wasn't caged like all those other men are? We used a CB6000. Shortly into it Ms. K. didn't like it mostly because after a day or two it got a little randy down there because of the tube design. She put an end to it's use and then began to only use it for punishment. Plus, it wasn't ever very comfortable.
We since got a steel cage and it was a game changer. Easy to clean, super comfortable and she absolutely love the way it looks and what it represents. So do I. In addition, it has quite literally changed and enhanced our mindsets in our respective roles in our loving marriage. It's been just wonderful.
All that said, to each their own. God Bless ....
Katie:
Thanks for responding so quickly. In answer to your “leading questions”:
Why are women capable of having multiple orgasms while men are generally one and done?
Easy: women are superior.
Post orgasm, women feel drawn to their partner, most men roll over as if having just finished a task, why?
(and don’t forget, go to sleep!) I understand it has to do with hormones and a complex evolutionary reason that Emma is better positioned to answer. But I believe it. I experience a kind of detachment after I orgasm, no matter how much I try to fight it. It’s a good reason to ration male orgasms (a finite resource as Emma proclaims.) However, there are ways to redirect the male after he cums. My wife is quite good at this. She gets me back to doting on her and loving her through acts of service. I can imagine that the click of a lock can accelerate guys back to where they should be. I am happy that I can get back without that.
Male orgasm is essentially required for procreation but not female orgasm, why is that?
You’ve got me there. Although I have a theory that the contractions of the female orgasm can help the semen make it’s way up the birth canal. When we were conceiving, we always made sure she came... well we always make sure she cums anyway!
Posted : 03/05/2021 1:01 pm
Due to skin irritation, a cage was not possible for me after several attempts. The statement: Most women are put off by the idea of their guy masturbating - is certainly true of my wife. After catching me several times, she put a stop to my masturbating behind her back - usually to porn. We began cage less chastity as well. The erection test as stated has worked well. There is no way of hiding the results and my wife knows exactly what to look for in determining my ejaculation status. Initially I cheated a few times and she detected it each time. Over time I have been better and she has been very open on giving me release - on HER schedule. It has improved our relationship significantly.
Posted : 06/05/2021 11:16 am
Glad to hear that the honor system is working for you too and that it did for @subhubphx for so many years.
The guilt of getting caught is a real low point, isn’t it, whether in the act or by failing the test. Like Katie’s man, I also admit to nighttime emissions, although I don’t wake her up to show her the proof.
