The best parts of locking him up!
Hello! I am new here, but have been reading a great deal of postings by women who find that locking the guy up is a turn on. As a result I am curious...hence my name,lol...as to why that has zero appeal to me. I am also not interested in feminization for a guy, and that's actually a big turn off for me. I have tried to see why it would be interesting and feel like a total failure at understanding it because none of the things being said seem relevant to me. I have always had a high sex drive and often initiated sex with a guy I found attractive so locking his anatomy up seems more of a punishment for me than a turn on. Are there any studies done about the women who don't find it interesting, and I doubt I am the only one...if so, oh well? Are there any women here who don't feel it has helped their relationship? Thank you everybody!
Hi! Actually it more about his behavior while he is locked than it is about the act of locking him. I like to have sex at least two or three times a week but I don't need my fiancé to cum. In fact, he currently is only allowed one orgasm a week! This really helps build that NRE (New Relationship Energy), changes the way he treats you and takes the emotional side of the relationship to a whole new level.
If feeling like you have full control and power over his sexuality doesn't do it for you or the cage is a complete turn-off for you then it may not be your thing and that is perfectly fine.
Having stopped masturbation all together has done SO MUCH instantly for my marriage. While i'm not locked up 24/7 (Wife doesn't care for it), i do self administer with a timed lock on a box for the keys.
my Wife currently allows me to orgasm every time W/we have intercourse, but unless She orgasms as well, i won't let myself do so. Better to save it for Her to orgasm (and do so together). i am trying to be a selfless husband.
My wife and I are male chastity practitioners. I do the wearing and she keeps me practicing. We really got into chastity when I developed ED after a health issue. I brought it up as a something we could look into. While I'd describe our relationship as a mild FLR, chastity play does lead to other great things in our current intimacy. One thing I secretly like is that she loves to threaten to leave me locked permanently when I get her irked. It makes be behave. One of the best parts of it, for us anyway, is that my device is so comfortable I can wear it constantly, taking certain precautions of course. A couple of weeks ago I played a round of golf wearing it. She loved to make the observation that I was probably the only person on the gold course wearing one. After wearing it for a long period of time, I'm absolutely charged up and ready to pleasure her. My wife loves the attention.
I honestly don't believe there are as many wearers as we'd like to think. I'm sure there have been many purchases made, but regular wearers? Probably few. I doubt I would be wearing one so much of the time if I didn't have ED from a health issue (very frustrating) and it wasn't comfortable for my particular anatomy. The fantasy kink does play nicely into the ED issue. Sort of making lemonade from lemons.
@phil-anonymous My cage is something that I both love and hate. I enjoy who it has made my wife open up and become. I hate the build-up of sexual tension especially the first few days. My wife is an amazing creature and giving her this control over me has made her feel comfortable to become so much more than I ever thought she could be. If other couples have not explored regular chastity with their partners I can only feel sorry for them. I appreciate this blog for separating the day to day loving normalcy from the bdsm femdom kink bullshit. I hope many of the men I pass on a daily basis are locked but I too feel it may be a small number. How would we know?
She loved to make the observation that I was probably the only person on the gold course wearing one.
I wonder how often we unknowingly pass by someone that is also wearing one.
I wonder that all the time. Every time I see a woman wearing a key around her neck, I wonder if she locks her man, or is one of those actual "key to my heart" types, innocently unaware what other connotation it has to some others.
I hate the build-up of sexual tension especially the first few days.
I get it. It's natural. I was helped when someone once reminded me that stress is the gap between expectation and reality. If the reality is that your orgasms will be controlled, or your cock caged, hope (expectation) otherwise will cause tension. Hang in there brother. You'll look back on these days in the future and smile.
"If the reality is that your orgasms will be controlled, or your cock caged, hope (expectation) otherwise will cause tension."
I'm lucky my wife plays some of the femdom role things. I think she enjoys them. Since I'm basically unable to cum (thought I've have had a few weak releases) and have ED, she can generate some good erotic tension by playing denial games with me or locking me up. I still get stirrings, and that makes the tension. The other evening I desperately wanted to orgasm but was unable to. The kinky thing she came up with is "I don't want you to anyway." Ironically, deep down I don't really want to orgasm. Even though I'm still in my 50s, I think our marriage is perfect now, and she doesn't care if I orgasm.
" If other couples have not explored regular chastity with their partners I can only feel sorry for them."
It sounds strange to people probably, but I agree. I think some people don't want to spend the money or don't have it. There's also probably fear of measuring wrong and not being able to use a cage. Fears of rejection or being considered weird is also a possibility.