Not sure

I've been married to my wife for almost 12 years and we have a great relationship, best friends and such. Two kids and we still have a good sex life but I know sometimes she is only going through the motions. I want to bring some of that back for us but even more importantly, I want her to feel those emotions again. I know she has sexual chemistry with one of my friends, each time we hang out they flirt innocently. I asked if she was attracted to him, she blushed and told me yes.

I know he is attracted to her as well and I want her to feel passionate sex even if it isn't with me. I want to provide her a safe way to meet AND EVEN EXCEED her sexual needs. I think this might be a way to give her the satisfaction that she needs. We've joked about dick size and I know he is larger than me so that is something I know she would enjoy also. I haven't outright asked if she wants to take it further than innocent flirting because I haven't fully prepared myself or her answer. I know that I would want to be present and watch if something was to happen. I think I want to watch her give him a blowjob and we can see how it makes us both feel before taking it to the next step on another day.

There is nothing more arousing than knowing that I bring my wife pleasure and satisfy her emotional and physical needs. She is a wonderful woman and the perfect mother for our kids. I want to give her everything of me emotionally and physically. I am not too worried about my wife falling for my friend, he isn't really her type aside from physically. He has arrogant tendencies which I know are a turn off for her.

This is about me, I want to watch. I don't want her to put on a show for me. I just want her to explore sexually with someone else that she is clearly attracted to.

This is about her, I want her to explore her lust without boundaries. I want her to feel safe and know that she has my support. 

This is about us, I want to give her what I cannot. Is the suggestion of sharing her a turn off? I know some women want their guy to be jealous and be possessive but I don't see her as an object and I don't see her sexuality as something that I own. I know the term cuck is a derogatory term and simply suggesting this would make me a cuck but that is really just a label. Right? 

Emma always talks about communication and I want to have a long conversation about this so we don't fuck up what we have. What questions should I ask and specifically what should we talk about?