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She wants her friend to peg me

Revolution
(@revolution)
Active Member

My girlfriend and I got into pegging at her insistence about a year ago. Turns out that I really enjoy it. She was into pegging with an ex and while doing something that she did with an ex wasn't appealing doing something I know she enjoys sexually is. It went from a once a month novelty to a big part of our sex life. 

About a week ago I found out that pegging came up in conversation with a couple of her friends and she admitted that we do it to one of her friends. That friend asked if she can peg me and my girlfriend approached me with the proposition. I was mixed with emotions when she asked me. One i wasn't happy to hear that she talked about this part of our sex life. Two it sounded arousing to be pegged by someone new. Three pegging is really intimate and needs trust and I am not sure that I want to be that vulnerable to her friend as a sexual novelty. This friend is cute and I am attracted to her but I feel like she would tell even more people. 

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Topic starter Posted : 07/12/2021 9:49 am
subhubphx
(@subhubphx)
Prominent Member Supporter
Posted by: @revolution

My girlfriend and I got into pegging at her insistence about a year ago. Turns out that I really enjoy it. She was into pegging with an ex and while doing something that she did with an ex wasn't appealing doing something I know she enjoys sexually is. It went from a once a month novelty to a big part of our sex life. 

About a week ago I found out that pegging came up in conversation with a couple of her friends and she admitted that we do it to one of her friends. That friend asked if she can peg me and my girlfriend approached me with the proposition. I was mixed with emotions when she asked me. One i wasn't happy to hear that she talked about this part of our sex life. Two it sounded arousing to be pegged by someone new. Three pegging is really intimate and needs trust and I am not sure that I want to be that vulnerable to her friend as a sexual novelty. This friend is cute and I am attracted to her but I feel like she would tell even more people. 

All we can really ever do is opine from our own personal perspective.  That said, I'd love this!  I am more than aware of the risks to our need/want for discretion in our relationship, but I'd enjoy if Ms. K. shared some of the more intimate details of our lifestyle with one or two of her more discerning friends.   I get it though, if her friend is the kind that talks about other people, she'll most certainly talk about you to others.  Probably already has.


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Posted : 07/12/2021 9:57 am
Revolution
(@revolution)
Active Member

It is a breach of trust because we never talked about it before her friends suddenly know. I feel awkward around them not knowing who knows and who doesn't. I don't even know how it would be to get pegged by someone with no emotional connection. Feeling vulnerable for my girlfriend is one of my favorite parts of pegging. Would this ruin that part of pegging for me?

The way it came up in conversation is like I was a conquest. Her exact words "I convinced him to let me peg him and now we do it all the time. Fucking love it."

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I know she does love it and I love doing it with her but I thought it was maybe just our thing.

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Topic starter Posted : 07/12/2021 10:07 am
Jd3064169
(@jd3064169)
Eminent Member

Ya, it come down to your preferences as a couple.  It could be a turn on fir you actually not knowing who knows & who doesn't.   Depends on if you enjoy some humiliation also. Yep it's your thing & she should have at least talked to you about how much she can share.  Cat's outta the bag now, so if it's a turn in for you & she's on board, talk about how it would go, who's naked (I'd vote for everyone to level playing field) would anything else sexual occur? One time thing? Is there anything between the two of them (sexually) maybe there's something there for u to enjoy. Will you be ok seeing her in the future in a non sequel environment?  Lots of ways to go on this, so talk it all our. 

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Posted : 07/12/2021 11:01 am
Revolution
(@revolution)
Active Member

I am new to female led relationships but she has some experience from that past relationship. I don't think I want to have my dick locked in a cage for the rest of my life but some of the aspects appeal to me. I think I will be ok with seeing her after but I feel like I might be ashamed. This has really only been one sided with me getting pegged by the friend but I might be able to say ok what's in it for me. What about feeling intimate and vulnerable with someone you don't know very well? 

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Topic starter Posted : 07/12/2021 11:44 am
lockedforlynn
(@lockedforlynn)
Eminent Member

Crazy and awesome.  I've done enough regrettable things in my life the humiliation of this wouldn't be more than I could handle.  That smirk or wink among friends or others would be quite the thrill.  I've also been in such a submissive state that this would be incredible conditioning.  I'm even on the jealous side where it comes to your partner acting on her desires.  You could have it much worse and her being proud of sexual exploration is the pinnacle of an interesting life together.  

You only live once, people forget.  I'd try it twice 😉

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Posted : 07/12/2021 11:49 am
true42
(@true42)
Estimable Member
Posted by: @revolution

It is a breach of trust because we never talked about it before her friends suddenly know. I feel awkward around them not knowing who knows and who doesn't. I don't even know how it would be to get pegged by someone with no emotional connection. Feeling vulnerable for my girlfriend is one of my favorite parts of pegging. Would this ruin that part of pegging for me?

The way it came up in conversation is like I was a conquest. Her exact words "I convinced him to let me peg him and now we do it all the time. Fucking love it."

I know she does love it and I love doing it with her but I thought it was maybe just our thing.

Dude, step back and take a breath. Relax.

People have been sharing things about their SO's with their friends since talking was invented. It's probably why talking was invented.

I don't want my wife sharing private stuff about me, particularly embarrassing stuff, but she is her own person, and if it helps her to talk about stuff (even stuff that embarrasses me), then she -- reluctantly -- has my blessing to do so.

It sounds like your girlfriend is really proud of your relationship. You're obviously doing something (or many things) well! So keep it up, and kudos to you!

That doesn't make any of this less embarrassing. I'm sorry that you have to deal with that. Embarrassment sucks. But please, do not feel ashamed (your girlfriend is proud!) or discouraged (you're doing something awesome in your relationship!)

So you can still hold onto your embarrassment. You can even tell her that it embarrasses you, but try not to curtail her ability to share with friends, because that will reduce her joy, and put up walls around her. And don't let your embarrassment ruin your own joy, because embarrassment is not the opposite of joy, just like terrifyingly scary rides at amusement parks aren't the opposite of enjoyment! (Or scary movies aren't the opposite of enjoying watching a movie, etc.)

Embarrassment? Normal, and ok, and nothing to hide.

Shame? Not at all appropriate. You already have so much to be proud of with your girlfriend; don't let this obscure that reality from you.

And by all means, enjoy the ride, if you can.

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Posted : 07/12/2021 1:46 pm
nevertoolate and J.M liked
J.M
 J.M
(@j-m)
Trusted Member

No shame or embarrassment in you and your gf having sex ?, who fucking who is beside the point.

You love and trust each other more then the average couple do, be proude of it.

You are enjoying it right, keep doing so. ?

My qustion is, you say the intimasy of it is important to you, important enouth to make sharing it with a friend a hard limmit ?

If it is, explain your feelings, talk to her.

If its a soft limmit, talk, go easy and stay safe.

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Posted : 07/12/2021 2:29 pm
need2beonmyknees
(@need2beonmyknees)
New Member

@revolution 

FLRs are really beautiful, intimate relationship with often more open and honest communication.  I wouldn't be upset personally if my girlfriend told her girlfriends that she dominates me (including pegging).  I'd prefer that she does so with people she trusts to not blab to the world.

As long as this information is shared only with like minded people, then I think it is okay.

I'd honestly be thrilled if my girlfriend offered me to her girlfriends, as it allows me to demonstrate my submission to her by submitting to her girlfriends.  It would be up to them on whether my girlfriend would be present when this happened.  See her girlfriend as an extension of her, so it is okay to be vulnerable.  This could lead to some magical and intimate relationships with her girlfriends as well.

Without risk, there is no reward.

Take a chance.  I'd take the leap if I was in your position.  You just need to absorb this.  Good luck!

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Posted : 07/12/2021 2:57 pm
nevertoolate
(@nevertoolate)
Eminent Member

Years ago we tried pegging. My idea but my wife did enjoy it somewhat. Later on, after a transfer, her new very best friend and partner in crime was told by her about our "experimenting." Her friend thought it was really nice of me to try it. That statement was a huge ego boost and turn on.

If relationships had been different, I would have quite honored if my wife had loaned me out for pegging duties. Very good looking friend, very nice person. A tall amazon of a woman. Oh boy!

Always assume your wife/girlfriend shares things with other girlfriends. From what I've read*, more likely to share than men, in spite of all the locker room boasting men don't really do.

* (All I know is what I read, and some real wife experiences.)

Set aside your concerns and enjoy the adventure!

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Posted : 07/12/2021 7:17 pm
bestwhencaged
(@bestwhencaged)
Trusted Member

Chances are, her friends knew about her pegging her ex. It would not surprise me if one asked if she was pegging you too. 

You probably want her to be present when her friend pegs you, possibly holding you to comfort and reassure you as you are vulnerable to her friend.

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Posted : 08/12/2021 1:01 pm
Jd3064169
(@jd3064169)
Eminent Member

Given she wants friend to peg you,  I can not see a situation where she would not be present.  It's probably a turn on for her 2 watch. 

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Posted : 08/12/2021 5:10 pm
jessie
(@jessie)
Active Member

Looks like your girlfrind has been a bad girl! Maybe you should punish her!

Anyway, it's clearly a breach of your trust, and that's a serious problem. Being pegged is something out of the ordinary, and you should not do it if you are unconfortable. If you're thinking about it, then don't be afraid to set boundaries. Maybe you can talk to her friend, and see if there's an emotional connection. But honestly, it's pointless if there is nothing in there for you - and it's not worth it if you'll end up feeling ashamed. Being able to say no is very important. 

This post was modified 5 months ago by jessie
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Posted : 08/12/2021 7:46 pm
TheRachel
(@therachel)
Eminent Member

Have a conversation to figure out the trust issue and when you feel comfortable that she understands the betrayal that you feel, agree to let her friend peg you. Listening to your girlfriend teach her friend how to peg you will be a lovely experience! 


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Posted : 09/12/2021 3:20 pm
J.M
 J.M
(@j-m)
Trusted Member

In the end its all about your feelings

Its your feelings and yours choice ?

If your gutt says you cant handle it say no and be sure to say explain why, dont allow your self to be forced or threatend to say yes, atleast not at this time and point.

If you are uncertain talk to your gf, seek guidens, support, tell her your concerns and fears. Hopefully you can bridge the gap and have a wonderfull experiance ?

This is my gutt feeling not yours, many more experiant nembers have said what they think and respect that.

But in the end its your feelings, your realtionship.

 

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Posted : 09/12/2021 7:32 pm

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