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Is there an ideal relationship configuration?

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Posts: 89
Estimable Member
Topic starter

Presently in most developed country's, as far as I know, what is considered normal is two people in relationship and laws are setup to support that. But is it ideal? 

If we weren't conditioned to think the two person monogamous relationship was ideal, and weren't conditioned to be as insecure as we are, what would an ideal relationship for humans likely look like?

Given that none of us are beyond conditioning, this question is likely impossible to answer but what do you think?

Posted : 30/06/2021 10:57 am
lbp6855, lbp6855 and lbp6855 reacted
Posts: 24
Illustrious Member

I think Emma has written about this and the concept of the "Sperm wars" where it use to be that women use to have sex with all of them men in her village so that the strongest sperm gets her pregnant and everybody helps raise the baby? I remember multiple stoners back in the day rambling about how it all started around individual property ownership, then women eventually became property thus we have the two partner dynamic. Something along those lines. Most people would still gravitate towards one person to be their main partner as far as emotional closeness and such regardless. They would just seek others for various other reasons. 

Posted : 01/07/2021 7:28 am
Posts: 886
Posted by: @brian

Given that none of us are beyond conditioning, this question is likely impossible to answer but what do you think?

Excellent post Brian.  Just excellent!


At the risk of sounding glib, the answer to your questions is a resounding "yes"!  There is an ideal configuration for each person, each couple, each group of lovers.  After much blathering by many of us, and all the mental masturbation that we put purselves through trying to define each and every aspect, then making sure we fit into the slot that is most widely agreed upon that we can or should fit in, ... after all of that ... none of it is even possible to consider if there hasn't been the work put into the relationship to be truly open and honest, and to communicate deeply and full.  Not the bullshit we think is communication, but actual real, honest communication. 

For those of us celebrating a holiday this weekend, go out there and make it a good one!

Peace and Love 

Posted : 02/07/2021 6:28 am
Posts: 43
Estimable Member

There is an ideal relationship configuration but it is different for different people. While I know people happily monogamous for many decades, I know others for whom this would be hell and juggle several relationships (with the knowledge of all parties). The only bad configuration would be one that entailed coercion and/or abuse.
My own ideal relationship configuration is what my wife tells me it is.

Posted : 05/07/2021 6:40 am
true42, joebear, true42 and 3 people reacted