Managing Your Man's Release

I keep coming back here day after day and learn something new each time. I think you have enough material for a book, Emma. Thanks for all the work you put in for our benefit.

So glad that you are enjoying the site! I feel like I still have so much learning to do before I am ready to publish a book but it isn't out of the question. I just need to feel like I am at a stopping point or turning point in my journey so I can write about it from start to finish. I feel like I've got a beginning and we are somewhere in the middle for now. I've also never published a book so I don't even know where to start!! Thanks for the kind words!

I have to admit that it is pretty embarrassing how little I, as a man, know about this topic or am consciously aware of its predictably cyclical nature. On many occasions I've tried (and failed) to stick to some sort of schedule, in the hope of using regular and/or much reduced masturbation to help with my motivation, mood or ability to focus on life tasks. Without oversight, it just never happened, or I simply wasn't able to look at myself objectively enough to figure out what the desired outcomes should be or whether I was achieving them.

My wife has never been very demanding when it comes to limiting my orgasms.  A week is about as long as she has ever asked me to go.  I would submit to longer periods of denial if that pleased her, but I think I would find it challenging.  But then, I have never found that my desire to please her drops off after an orgasm.  Gratitude motivates me to continue to serve her after I cum, especially when she makes me cum with her own hand as a treat.  But I acknowledge that there is an intense feeling of submissiveness when I have just given her an orgasm either with my tongue or one of her toys and she tells me there will be no orgasm for me.

a really good way to condition him like that.

as a man i would encourage the woman not to stick to 7 days but to keep it very variable. so sometimes 5 and sometimes 14 days. in no case a fixed frame and thus make the man's life too safe.

play with him and after 7 days simply extend or shorten 2 or 3 days. always surprise him and leave him in the dark.

okay, there has to be the time freedom.

i am sure that the man can get used to 2 or 3 weeks without any problems and stay balanced. it just must not suddenly just become more and he is torn out of his habit. preventing the habit is the key.

We are retired and I retired a couple of years before my wife. She found out I had been masturbating at home while she was at work. She wasn't too happy thinking about being at work and i was home pleasuring myself. That is how we got started with chastity. I started wearing a stainless steel device during the day time only, I could take it off when she got home, although sometimes I did just sleep in it. I would have it on before she left and at first, took it off as soon as she got home, later I wore until bedtime. We still had sex some, mostly on the weekend.

You would be surprised how much more I got done around the house not wasting so much time. It even surprised me. I was way more productive, cleaned house, took care of the yard, shopping etc.

Yep, doing other stuff to distracte you from the cage.

@russ195 Has your frequency of sex changed at all the longer you have been locked up and now that your wife is retired? 

This is such a good post, I keep re-reading it. Like much of male chastity the denial cycle is very couple eccentric and important for both. I think how long someone can go, may have a lot to do with how much intercourse they are having during the denial - that could just be me though. We still haven't found that point of diminished returns, so we continue to add days or weeks from the last longest denial period currently pushing passed 6 - 8 weeks.

No frequency of sex has not changed, it did for a while, we did it more. But after a few months, she cut down a lot of sex activity. I don't lock up as much, she is always around. She has me go shopping with her most of the time so I am not left alone at the house. The thought of me playing while she is gone is not good in her mind. We still have sex, but she controls how often.

If you'd like to maximize the chastity lock up experience for both of you, try gradually extending his periods of chastity. i.e. if 7 days is your favorite cycle, extend it to 9 days for awhile. His body will get used to this, then after a few months, then you can go for 11 days. This will maximize his sexual frustration and tension, as well as lend some variety to the experience. (Don't forget to edge and tease him!)

Posted by: @williamportor

then after a few months, then you can go for 11 days

Hahahaha. "A few months". You are funny.

My wife wasn't a big believer in the "ease into things" approach. More like "throw ya of the cliff" approach. Much more exciting lol.

@brian 

My complements on your discipline. If I were locked for more than a week, I'd be climbing the walls. 

Posted by: @williamportor

@brian 

My complements on your discipline. If I were locked for more than a week, I'd be climbing the walls. 

 

That's what I said ... a few months ago.