Hi
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first of all, I LOVE this site amd its content. Me and my wife have started using orgasm denial to cope with my masturbation problem. This has led us to an easy start of FLR. My wife love PIV and my stamina is gone. I just cant control it after refraining. I used to have good stamina. Now it is making me feel bad for my wife and she is disappointed. What to do? Would love to see some content on this that woman new to the game could understand. Insee you guys have sex without release for Kevin. How do you train him?
Welcome to the site! Stamina can be a problem and it isn't something that is overcome overnight but it can be resolved. The key for us was to separate sex from orgasm. About 99% of Kevin's orgasms are through masturbation, either him or I stroking him to completion.Â
When having PIV, simply stop after a period of time - preventing orgasm. He will be able to experience a new and different type of sex. Kevin explained it as enjoying the road and not focusing on the destination. When the focus is on the destination (or preventing the destination) then the focus is on himself and his sexual needs. When the focus is on the road, the focus shifts to your needs and your pleasure.Â
It did take us a few months to get where we are today and we do still have to stop having sex periodically because he gets close and knows when to take a break. I don't get upset with him when we stop sex prematurely as I realize he is doing it as a selfless act to ensure that my needs are met. It sounds like the two of you are on the right path, it will just take some time to get there.
There are some other things you can do that might be fun, we started using a training clicker to create an association between his orgasms and an audible cue. We didn't persist long enough with that one but I've heard of others being successful with that method.