How to get my wife more interested?

All I can say is read the room and focus on the things she seems to enjoy most. There is no magic formula to getting someone interested in something that doesn't flip their switch. Believe me. If there was, i would shatter any boundry I had to make it happen. I'm pretty unsatisfied right now and frustrated.

Be respectful and make sure you are meeting her needs the best you can. Maybe she will surprise you.

Good luck, man.

Share websites and stories with her that you think she'd be interested in. @Emma does a great job on this site. There is another section with some more sites. You can also search some blogs based on your (or more importantly, her) preferences. There are a few good articles on Medium.

Just keep exploring and do your best to make it a road you travel together. That is, don't make yourself one more thing that she needs to fit into her day, but find ways to explore shared interests.

i think my wife got interested when i started being super productive.. ironing and changing her bedding, all household chores, cooking meals, dishwasher etc, generally stepping up a few gears. plus being much more attentive sexually. it started slowly but we are nine years in now.. now she has the keys, all three, no emergency! around her neck permanently. i asked the other day if she still liked me being caged, i try not to bring it up much, and she said the things she likes is knowing she has control and that there is no pressure on her to take care of my needs unless she wants to. She said, that to say, no! not tonight and know she is free from being pestered was a game changer! 😳 she now revels in saying you’re locked and i own it. so… i’d just prove that being caged makes you more loving industrious and attentive to her needs. it didn’t take my wife very long at all after suggesting it..  mainly as a cure to masturbating… ten days and she was in on it.  

I hear your frustration in feeling unsatisfied and wanting your partner to share more enthusiasm. At the same time, trying to pressure or convince someone rarely works.

Rather than focus on what she isn't into, I suggest gently exploring what does bring her pleasure - even in small ways. Pay attention without judgement.

For some inspiration, allow me to introduce the Dildo Machine Pearlvibe Mixer (see photo)! This remote-controlled machine's adjustable angles, rhythmic thrusts and lightweight form facilitates self-discovery across gender identities, orientations and abilities.

[Photo of Mixer Sex Machine]

While no product can substitute open communication and consent, the Mixer tries to expand assumptions around who “deserves” sexual autonomy and hands-free fun as one ethical building block.

I wish you patience and compassion as you navigate these complex waters together. If she continues feeling discomfort, her needs should come first, hard as that may be to accept. Consider seeing a sex-positive therapist to uncover any underlying issues in a safe space.