How to Train for Sex Without Orgasm?

Posted by: @locked4_wife

My wife mentioned that she wanted to train me to fuck her hard and long without stopping ....

Don't we all want that?  When it's fucking she is looking for, it's especially difficult with chastity, tease and denial and orgasm control, all of which are essential in a WLM/FLR.  Plus, the effective use of a tongue is great and all, but it's not a to penetration.  Ms. K. expects both.  Sometimes accommodations need to be made in order for her to have what she wants, when she wants it and how she wants it.  What those accommodations is something unique to every couple.

Posted by: @locked4_wife

How have you trained your man to fuck you without him being allowed to orgasm?

We tried something we called "cock therapy".  It was basically a direct association with being brought to the edge of orgasm, and something unpleasant.  We used a paddle and during the "therapy" (sounds clinical doesn't it?) I would be brought to the edge of orgasm in various ways, but usually by her hand.  Every time we had to stop to prevent ejaculation, a pretty good reddening of my bottom would immediately be administered, followed immediately by more edging, and so on.  That would continue until my Wife felt like enough learning got done.

It worked pretty actually, but in the end we (I) were still lacking the ability to fuck as long and as hard as SHE wanted without stopping, which of course is the goal.  Afterall, she should be able to expect the kind of fucking she wants without having to worry about stopping.  

Posted by: @locked4_wife

What did you find worked well and didn’t work well?

For us anyway, we have discovered a particularly wonderful dildo from (Vixskin by SheVibe) that she will have me wear in her strap on harness, over my cage.  We both actually like it very much.  It's exclusively how I'm allowed to fuck her, but it is more and more as time goes on.  

@locked4_wife What a frustrating (in every sense of the word) problem to have.  I have a few ideas that might help you solve your problem.

1.  Try different positions.  For me personally, I know that I can go much longer when I am on my back and my GF is on top.  I also last much longer when doing it doggie style than in the missionary position.  But sooner or later, especially when you have been denied for a long period of time, you are going to have a problem.  While the threat of punishment may add to your torment, I am not sure how I see that will be an effective form of delay when push comes to shove. Presumably, the punishment would ensue if you come without permission and you would be allowed to stop to prevent ejaculation.  So, switching to oral or some other kind of stimulation would prevent punishment, but it won't do anything to meet your wife's desire to have you fuck her long and hard.

2.  Use a strap on.  She wouldn't even have to take you out of chastity for that and you can be required to go as long as she wants.

3.  Use numbing cream and/or condoms.  While a condom or two will reduce your sensitivity alone, one would certainly be necessary to make sure that any numbing cream you use on yourself is not transferred to her. 

4.  This one probably misses the point, but she could make you masturbate to orgasm at some appropriate period of time before you are to perform that will ensure that you can still get hard, but no longer have a hair-trigger.  

Good luck!  And please report back if you find something that works.

@allabouther Thanks, I think we’ll likely go the route of stopping when I get to close, changing positions, and working up my ability to endure greater amounts of stimulation. We tried numbing condoms and she hated them because they were too thick and felt uncomfortable during sex. The strap on is not something we’re ready for. I can see the appeal but it’s not in her comfort zone at all. To a degree I think she enjoys how difficult it is for me to hold back after being teased and caged for a while. 

I believe that @Kevosphere might be able to help with this one.  

I recall from some of Miss Emma's blogs that they do this frequently and Kevin is able to last for a substantial time.  

When you are deeply connected with your partner you know his body on an intimate level and you know when he is getting close, just take a pause when his breathing gets rhythmic. Just slow down the action and cuddle for a while. If you want to try again, give it a few minutes before you do. If he normally cums in about 5 minutes, set a timer for four. This is more difficult with a minute man but if he takes 5-8 minutes (the average) then you should be able to manage it effectively.

@evolvingyourman_ivcr4j thank you for the advice! We’ve been going this route and my wife is very good at sensing when I’m close and slowing the action. I think I just am going to have to continue this way until I can endure the feeling long enough to bring her through her orgasm. Orally I can satisfy her easily and in the past I have been able too when she rides me. But now it’s just so difficult to last long enough while she rides me, especially once she starts really going. 

@evolvingyourman_ivcr4j   Welcome back Emma!

Posted by: @subhubphx

@evolvingyourman_ivcr4j   Welcome back Emma!

Yay!

thank you!

Posted by: @locked4_wife

@evolvingyourman_ivcr4j thank you for the advice! We’ve been going this route and my wife is very good at sensing when I’m close and slowing the action. I think I just am going to have to continue this way until I can endure the feeling long enough to bring her through her orgasm. Orally I can satisfy her easily and in the past I have been able too when she rides me. But now it’s just so difficult to last long enough while she rides me, especially once she starts really going. 

I think that is the best approach. The body can be easily trained because we are animals at our core and our sexual side is arguably the most animalistic of our psyche. For delayed ejaculation you can train him to take less and less time. For premature ejaculation, you can train him to go longer. I was even trying to do clicker training with Kev at one point! Cumming on command (for either of us) would be insane.

@evolvingyourman_ivcr4j thank you again for your help and guidance! 

Posted by: @evolvingyourman_ivcr4j

I was even trying to do clicker training with Kev at one point!  

Such a novel concept. I heard about this in a Podcast a while back. If I may ask, were you successful?
As always, it is important to talk about it and agree upon terms of training before starting such training. 

What is clicker training? Do you know the podcast link?

My wife's solution is to have me wear a strap-on, sometimes with my cage on, but usually with it off. The frustration of my cock being able to brush up against her during sex, but with never with enough stimulation to make me cum is maddening! And she loves it!

@bella909 Sorry, I didn't see your question. It took a minute, but I think this is the correct Sex Nerd Sandra podcast (it starts around 39 minutes).