What do you say to folks who observe that you have an unusual dynamic?

My fiancé and I don’t force our relationship on anyone, but we do “hide in plain sight.”  We don’t do anything to mask the fact that my fiancé is the person in charge in our personal life.  We will tell anyone who asks that I am in charge at work and she is in charge everywhere else. Most people think we are making a joke. But we are actually being brutally honest.

The other day my fiancé told me about a time she went a little farther with a mutual friend who is devoted to both of us. The friend knows that we are deliriously happy together, but because she knows us so well, she clearly sees that we live by a different dynamic than most couples. She knows I am a hyper-alpha male at work, but also knows that neither of us hides the fact that my fiancé “rules the roost” in our personal lives.  She asked about how my fiancé was able to exercise such control in a relationship with her boss.

My fiancé shared a little more with this friend than we usually do when she explained that she is very happy to be in control and that, because I have so many people and things to be responsible for with the businesses that I own, I welcome her ruling the roost because it liberates me from the “constant drive” of being an alpha male and allows me to shelter under her leadership. I know about this conversation because both women told me about it. I don’t think this lady knows that my fiancé strictly owns my orgasms, but she does “get” what we are up to in a general sense. She is actually envious of my fiancé.