Kevin was good last week, Sunday came around and he got his weekly release. I decided not to lock him up this week. We don’t do that every week, sometimes we do it for two weeks, sometimes for two days. Just not this week. I’ve seen a few conversations our forum from some of you that have good luck with the honor system so I decided to give that a try this week.
Kev and I had sex yesterday (Monday) and we both had a good time, he wasn’t permitted to cum with sex – as is the norm for us. Normally after we finish we just lock right back up, cuddle for a while and go on with our evening. When we aren’t using the cage, things get more challenging since there is nothing there to prevent constant touching. We go through it but it wasn’t pretty.
This morning he woke up and all he would talk about is getting a release. I reminded him that he isn’t locked this week and he should be on his best behavior if the honor system is going to work. If not, our little experiment can end and with the twist of a key we can easily go back to using the cage. The gentle reminder worked for the time being.
He is off work today so one of two things will happen, he is either going to masturbate today or he is not going to masturbate and will nag me to death tonight. If he masturbates today, it will be pretty clear from his behavior but I’ll ask anyway. Assuming he doesn’t pop off during the day today, I know what to expect this evening but I also know that there will be a complete reversal the following day.
Tomorrow he will be extra-loving and I will be showered with attention, massages, conversation. All of the things that make orgasm control such an integral part of our relationship. I truly enjoy seeing both sides of his personality and this feels like the most effective way to get a good balance of both. The worst part is the three day itch; as I call it. For those of you who use the honor system, how do you handle that three day itch? Do you experience the same thing?
- Day 1
No complaining, some conversation and joking about it.
- Day 2-3
Toward the end of day 2 some complaining and a grouchy boy. Obsessive conversation about the cage and reminders about how difficult it is for him. Keep up the teasing and don’t entertain annoying conversations and he will snap out of it.
- Day 4-7
You’ve got a wonderful attentive guy who loves touching and making you feel special. It can get annoying sometimes but just brush him off and enjoy the extra shine ? from him. We normally allow a release on day 7 but sometimes we go longer.
- Day 8-12
This is usually the same as day 4-7 but if you don’t stay on top of some quick daily teasing, he can become resentful or grouchy.
- Day 13+
As you get close to the two week period, he can go through phases that can be somewhat unpredictable. Most of it is generally positive like the previous week but if he starts to act depressed, consider unlocking early. We’ve had great results with 7 or 14 day lockups and generally don’t go longer except with times like Locktober.
It always seems like the second or third day has a brief episode of grumpy boy. There is a definite period of time when his subconscious realizes that he isn’t in control. He realizes that this isn’t a fun little fetishy game and the keys have been handed over to me. His penis is a part of his body that isn’t under his control and each and every time we lock him up, his body comes to that exact same realization after almost the exact same amount of time. You would think his subconscious would learn by now.
When locked, it isn’t as big of a deal because I just wave the keys and remind him about his scheduled release or extension thereof. I am questioning the honor system because without the keys I feel a bit powerless. Maybe that’s just me but I don’t feel the same level of control when I don’t have the ?. I told him not to masturbate today, let’s see what happens.
Edit: Since posting this blog, we’ve gone back to the cage and decided that the honor system isn’t the best for us but I’m glad we gave it a shot.